Grow Slow

Did you make any New Year’s resolutions? If so, are you still on track? If you aren’t, there is no reason to give up. Simply jump back on board and keep going. Every day is a fresh start. It is good to have goals but too many goals keep us in a cycle of hustle and stress. It can suck us into the comparison trap, and we fail because we start too big, go too fast. That is why I am taking steps to keep things small and manageable.

We are two weeks into January, and it is easy to start feeling overwhelmed already. Yesterday, while paying for groceries, I saw strips of marshmallow Easter eggs at the till point. The Christmas leftovers have barely been digested and here come the chocolate bunnies. It is more difficult to appreciate the abundance around us and enjoy the moment, when we are constantly being propelled forward to the next thing.

2019 for me was a huge year of growth, good and bad, happy and sad, from physical challenges to emotionally ones, with weird and wonderful projects (including the potato challenge!) thrown into the mix. I never imagined how much stuff would take place in just 12 months, and am grateful for it all, but now I need things to unfold a little more slowly.

As I type ‘unfold’ my brain jumps to last night. I was folding and packing away washing when my husband came home, and he said something funny about me doing it ‘again’. I had a laugh.

Housework does have a magical ability to keep piling up as soon as you think you’re done. We can all relate to that! Whether it be a pile of laundry, 2020 goals or relationships, it is better to work on them step by step and not get discouraged by the mountain we see in front of us. Accept it is process and don’t procrastinate. Those socks will still require folding, even if you ignore them for days (unless you have a ‘fairy’ in your house).

Sometimes it is one step forward and two steps back. Other times it is the other way around. Keep going. Even if you grow slow, keep at it. It’s worth it.

 

Just Do Something

It is the 5^th day of December. I have been 40 for 5 days. I almost feel like going from 39 to 40 is like going from New Year’s Eve to New Year’s Day. Overnight things are meant to be fresh and new, as we implement goals, ideas and resolutions with enthusiasm and passion! However, reality tends to be overwhelming and a few days in, you fear you set yourself up for failure and have accomplished very little.

While chatting to friends this week, it seems many of us felt we were living our best life and worst life at the same time this year. I like to think that no experience is ever wasted if we learn from it and use it for good. Then it becomes tuition. First it hurts, then it changes you, but you can come back stronger, and fall back in love with yourself, the world and life again.

We cannot expect different results if we keep doing the same thing. We are what we repeatedly do. The good news is you don’t have to wait for New Years to have a new resolution or attitude. Every day is a new beginning! There is nothing wrong with having a long-term goal or dream that scares you. I am all for that. After missing Comrades this year, I have entered to try run again in 2020. It freaks me out, but I am all in.

However, I want to encourage you to make small, every day resolutions too. Make it something simple.

“The secret of your future is hidden in your daily routine.” – Mike Murdock

Don’t feel pressure from others because they are all aiming to conquer mountains (literally and figuratively) and you want to find time to read a book 30 minutes a week. Choose whatever is meaningful and unique to you. Perhaps you can aim to try a new recipe every Sunday or be kind to the person you share an office with. Your challenge may be to hum, not hoot, while being stuck in traffic or … (insert something you do daily and want to change).

I hope this random waffle on my heart this morning, makes a little sense and inspires you to start somewhere. Do something.

Thank 2019 for the lessons and let go of whatever is holding you back.

Make 2020 better, starting now!

Half-Time Sports Thoughts

Local sports fans are spoilt for choice today. It is day three of the cricket test between South Africa and England, the Sharks are playing rugby here in Durban too and then tonight, the match our household is most excited about – Liverpool versus Newcastle United. My favourite activity is running of course but I love most sports and marrying someone who watches everything (golf, soccer, rugby, cricket…) I have become quite good at knowing who is sitting where, on any log, at any given time!

Playing a sport requires practice and preparation, which will equip the team to move with confidence and believe in themselves. The professionals make it look easy but we don’t realize they all had a great deal to learn before reaching the level that we see them at today. In my own life, I have learnt that most things are harder than you thought they would be and take longer to produce results than you ever imagined you could endure. Its seems most people want instant gratification and are not willing to work for what they hope to achieve. Opportunities rarely drop into your lap. You need to work aggressively for your dreams and be a lifetime learner.

I have come a long way, both in my running successes and my personal triumphs over difficult circumstances, but it has taken a long time and many years of preparation prior to each stage of progress. I have many big dreams in my heart that I believe I am supposed to do but sometimes it is easy to get discouraged when nothing seems to happen. However, I believe that every experience in my life is preparing me for things I have in my future and I do my best to learn from them.

Small beginnings are sometimes all that we can handle at the time and it is better to slow down and learn from every day, while enjoying the journey. Press past the judgement and criticism of others, try new things and see what works and what fits right in your own heart. Have the courage to start!

#AsicsFrontRunner

I enjoy being outdoors, which is one of the reasons I love to run.

My biggest motivation is inspiring others, while still having fun!

It’s not only great for my body but also helps relax my busy mind.

The runners are like family to me, this community is one of a kind!

 

The people I have met while running, have helped change my life.

This journey has shaped me into a better person, friend and wife.

ASICS is the brand I have always trusted to run in, right from the start.

I am a loyal fan and believe in what they stand for with all my heart.

 

The FRONTRUNNERS are passionate athletes, many are friends of mine.

Some of the incredible women include Charmaine, Jani and Caroline.

The guys are great too, Quaniet, Admire, Nicholas and the rest of the team.

Movement is in our blood and if chosen to join them, it would be a dream.

#IMoveMe

You’ve Got What It Takes

I get a lot of enjoyment from running and sharing my journey with others. While social media can have a negative side, one of the positives is that it provides a great platform to impact people (which is far better than wasting time and energy trying to impress them!)

Although many people admire ‘famous’ people, just as many, if not more, look up to everyday people too, those they can relate to and connect with. After over a month of not running, I was worried I may not get my ‘mojo’ back when I returned. Supporting friends, sharing photos and chatting to others definitely helped motivate me but there is nothing better than actually being back on the road or out on the trails to lift my spirits.

The year has only just begun but I am already inspired by my running family who are training towards their goals and the sense of belonging and community is something I don’t take for granted. I have found that loving acceptance and being a healthy example if far better than preaching or criticizing others when we are trying to encourage them, especially those new to our sport. In running, like in life, we need to respect other people’s motivation for doing things and their reasons for taking on new challenges.

We all have the ability to inspire others. It’s contagious! Whenever you feel like giving up, remember there is probably someone who is watching you. “Accidental inspiration” was a phrase I heard recently and I love it. By simply being real and telling your story, you may be inspiring someone. You’ve got what it takes!

Intentions Not Resolutions

As I type this tonight, newsfeed is filled with #transformationtuesday posts and I am sitting on the stairs (which is great after spending the day on my feet doing DIY) taking a few moments to reflect on how I have ‘transformed’ since this time last year. Since I like to share my thoughts, I am writing them down rather abruptly (in case I am needed again) however, I think I am in luck, as a VIP soccer game is starting soon, so the toolbox may be packed away until tomorrow!

Most people nowadays are living complicated lives and they are constantly worn out and weary. The January to-do list has already begun and instead of enjoying the holidays, they are worrying about what lies ahead and robbing today of its joy.  It is easy to get sucked up in what everyone else is doing and spend your life wishing things were simpler, but wishing doesn’t change anything. I’m not somebody who makes New Year’s resolutions but rather prefer to re-evaluate my priorities and goals on a regular basis throughout the year. Often this means making daily decisions to adjust my approach to circumstances and keep things simple.

One of the ways I have transformed this year is to not let my fear of what others think of me stop me from pursuing my goals. Many of my problems stemmed from being insecure and trying to please people, which left me miserable and frustrated. I finally realized I can’t change people and circumstances that are out of my control but instead can only change myself and my approach to them. There are plenty opportunities to get upset about something every day but as someone once said, ‘Choose your battles’ and rather let things go and remain peaceful, especially if they don’t make any difference in the bigger picture (and if we are honest with ourselves, most of the stuff we get upset about, isn’t all that important.)

Things are going to happen that we didn’t plan for and we don’t like (the water leaks we are busy repairing are a good example!) Things like this used to make me very upset. Luckily, I have learned it is not worth losing my joy over it and instead accept that this is life and deal with it, without having a bad attitude. Many of us usually visualize a perfect Christmas and perfect holiday but we all know that isn’t reality. Unrealistic expectations set us up to be miserable. If things haven’t gone as planned for you, don’t be so hard on yourself. Decide to enjoy it all anyway and going forward, tackle each day as it comes.

“Lay down the bat, and pick up a feather.” -Anonymous

I am now putting myself to the test by adjusting my priorities and letting the house mess remain ‘as is’ until the morning and instead I’m off to join the husband on the couch to watch his favourite soccer team play their match. He loves it when I enjoy the game with him and so for the rest of the night, the to-do list is forgotten and “You’ll Never Walk Alone” will be the only thing filling my head!

From Pain To Purpose To Podium

On Sunday I joined 620 other runners as we made our way to Nagle Dam for the 1000 Hills Challenge. This is an epic, tough event and for many (like me) it was the first time visiting this hidden gem, tucked in the upper reaches of the Valley of 1000 Hills. It has become one of KZN Trail Running’s premier races and a highlight on the trail running calender. With 5km, 10km, 20km and 38km options, there was something for everyone.

With the picturesque rural setting of Msinsi Nagle Dam, the unspoilt bushveld and the breath-taking beauty of the route, we were able to endure the tough terrain and steep climbs, because the joy of absorbing your surroundings, made the challenge worthwhile. I felt privileged to be there. Wildlife like zebra were around too and gave another unique experience to the event.

From an adventurous river crossing to running through the tunnel under the dam, these new experiences are ones I will treasure forever. An unexpected highlight was winning the 20km ladies race and it is a moment I will never forget. My trail family made me feel so welcome and we all had a great morning relaxing in the sunshine afterwards, enjoying the festive atmosphere.

Running the trails has helped me overcome an emotional last few weeks and it reminded me that every season of life has a purpose. For some reason I have been drawn to the wilderness and dirt roads and found them to be the perfect metaphor for this stage of my journey. Like the terrain we run on, you go through mountains and valleys, get caught in currents and often need others to help you through those difficult patches, until you find yourself on dry land again. However, just when you think it is going smoothly, you hit another rocky road and have to reassess your game plan.

Many years ago, I wrote a book entitled “Whole Pieces”. Through my infertility journey I realized if you trust God with the shattered pieces of your life, He can make something good out of it. Not everything is good. There is so much we all endure that is plain awful! But in time, God can take the very thing that you are battling with and turn it around to use for good as He intends. I have seen this happen in my own life several times and want to encourage you to never give up and know your pain can be used for purpose.

 

Running On The Rooftop

Perseverance in the parking lot.

“I’m not running around as a continual ray of sunshine. I just I don’t believe in wasting time feeling sorry for myself.” (Aimee Mullins)

Tenosynovitis (inflammation of the fluid-filled sheath that surrounds a tendon) is not a fun injury. Underlying medical conditions mean I take longer to heal than others and I always have to think long-term when it comes to my bones and muscles, which are already compromised. This is why I chose to rest and stop completely, rather than take medication and injections to speed up recovery.

(Despite the poor quality of the photos, I still wanted to share them. I think my phone was as dizzy as me after running in circles around the parking lot a few times!)

I have been out of running for a month, but still get up at 4:30am every day, doing my best to keep fit at gym and tread water in the swimming pool. I refused to give up on my goals, despite the fact that my Comrades Marathon training has fallen away and vital mileage is lost. I am happy that I am finally at the stage where I can slowly start jogging again and monitor myself step by step.

“Life is getting up an hour early to live an hour more.” (Unknown)

I needed to find a flat course for my return to running and since I am alone and safety is a factor, I decided that the best option would be to use the rooftop parking lot of our local mall. It has been humbling and mentally tough to run round and round (it is only 200m!) However, I am grateful to be back on my feet and have adjusted well, making the most of this limited space and solitude.

“Everything starts with a sunrise, but it’s what we do before it sets that matters.” (K. McGraw)

One of positive sides of running on a rooftop has been the incredible views of the sunrise each morning. Often I have spent more time admiring this majestic sight than running!

“The sunrise of course, doesn’t care if we watch it or not. It will keep on being beautiful, even if no one bothers to look at it.” (Gene Amole)

I am not sure what will happen on 4 June 2017 but for now, I am doing my best to keep positive and focus on today, rather than worry about the future.

Treading Water

“To tread water” is an idiom that means doing something / being active without making any progress.

The idiom alludes to the term’s literal meaning that is “keep one’s head above water by remaining upright and pumping the legs.”

In my last post, I mentioned I was struggling with a niggle in my left leg. I am still not fully recovered and the pain and inability to run is starting to get the better of me. Unable to cycle or walk, my only option is to swim, which is my least favourite exercise. However, today I attempted to run in the pool at the gym (the small heated pool at the back, not the big one in full view of everyone!) and it is here that I came up with these thoughts…

I know that the only thing I can change right now is my own attitude and I need to choose to be happy right where I am, even if I find myself treading water in a closed space, instead of running outside with my friends. If we refuse to have a positive attitude and make the most of where we are, our progress will be stifled.

There are always going to be problems to get through and after you overcome one obstacle, there will be something else to overcome. That is why the popular phrase, ‘enjoy the journey, not just the destination’ is so important. I have to bear this in mind because as admirable as it is to set big goals and reach them, I can’t get so focused on accomplishing them that I don’t enjoy where I am right now.

Perhaps it is time we stop treading water and start making waves!

The Comrades Marathon and The Arnold Classic Africa show I am aiming for are both prestigious events but they will not keep me happy. We can’t get into the habit of waiting for a special occasion or for everything to be ‘perfect’ before we grant ourselves permission to enjoy life. No big event is going to provide lasting happiness.

We have to appreciate today and enjoy life’s journey.

On a positive note, I was in a bikini this weekend (nothing to do with the swimming pool this time!) and placed 6^th at The King Shaka Classic bodybuilding competition. I almost didn’t enter, as my swollen foot was too severe, but in the end (with the help of a tub of Vaseline!) I managed to squeeze it into my heels and with a slight limp, step on stage with a smile.

For some reason the verse from Paul McCartney’s song “We All Stand Together” just popped into my head (and will probably play over and over in your head now too!) so let me conclude with this:

“Win or lose, sink or swim

One thing is certain we’ll never give in

Side by side, hand in hand

We all stand together”

Growing Pains

‘Winners never quit.’ We have all heard that saying before. I have had a difficult week nursing a niggle in my left leg. It feels like the ‘growing pains’ I used to have as a child. Did you ever get that sensation? A dull, numb ache, that won’t let up? A few years ago, I would have pushed through the pain and been stubborn but I am older and wiser now and know recovery is essential, especially with a big goal like Comrades ahead of me. So I have taken the week off and will try run again over the weekend.

I am being responsible by doing the right thing, but it isn’t easy and a part of me wants to give up. Why can’t things ever go smoothly? However, I have made up my mind that I will finish my course and accomplish my goals, so I am pushing through the fear and tears and reminding myself why I started this journey in the first place. Sometimes it is important to see how far we have come, instead of worrying about how far we still have to go.

I have said from the start, if I chose to compete on the bodybuilding stage again and train for Comrades simultaneously, I wanted to enjoy it. If I lost my enthusiasm then I needed to stop. When faced with opposition like injury, public scrutiny or even your own self-doubt, it is difficult to keep going and easy to lose your joy. I may not be getting everything right on this journey, it is certainly a big learning experience for me and perhaps I may not even get the results I’m hoping for, but I will never quit!

It takes less emotional energy to walk in faith than walk in doubt and fear, so I am going to finish what I started, with a smile and know that the sacrifice and preparation will be worth it in the end. I do love these two sports and it would bother my heart if I took the easy way out. Obstacles will always be there when pressing towards a goal, but we need to push on with determination and not let fear stop us.

“Maybe life isn’t about avoiding the bruises. Maybe it’s about collecting the scars to prove we showed up for it.” – Unknown